Court Etiquette

For centuries etiquette has been used to create a code of conduct within different cultures; even though some has dissolved many still stand today that uphold honor to the ones who hold positions in Court. 

There are different circumstances where etiquette within the Court was held up to the highest regard even when it comes to a kind gesture.

Court Etiquette

Although the origin of court etiquette is traceable to Philip the Good, Duke of Burgundy, it was in Spain that its fantastic growth was most luxuriant. A story is told of the wife of Charles II., who, catching her foot in the stirrup, as she fell off he horse, remained in a helpless condition in the presence of forty-three attendants. Motionless stood the attendants, and helpless hung the royal lady. Because the equerry was out of the way whose duty it was to unhook the queen’s ankle on such occasions. A passer-by who ventured to release her Majesty was rewarded with gold for his services, but was condemned to exile for his indiscretion.

In France the King could not visit a sick person in bed unless a second bed was prepared for his Majesty to occupy during the visit, since no subject could have been suffered to lie down while his Sovereign was in a less easy position. In this way Louis XIII, visited Richelieu, and le Grande Monarque condoled with Marshal Vallars after a wound received at Malplaquet.

At Versailles, when Marie Leczinska was fretting because cards were interdicted on the occasion of court mourning, she was relieved by a courtier’s assurance that “the game piquet was deep mourning”.

In England at the present day, we have a Herald’s College to settle who shall walk first in a procession; an important point, considering that there are ninety ranks of men classed in order of precedence om the sovereign to a burgess. Pope Julius II drew up a list of precedence among European sovereigns, twenty-six in number, of whose titles it is noteworthy that four only exist in their old form – the Emperor of Germany, and the Kings of England, Spain and Portugal.

It is easy to understand that ceremonial would hold an especial tyranny in the strict circle of diplomacy. In 1661 the Spanish Envoy, attacking the French Ambassador in the streets of London, hamstrung his horses and killed his men merely in order to get to court before his rival. In certain cases, every detail of diplomatic form was regulated by the strictest equality.

Thus, we have seen the French and imperialist envoys balancing step at the door of the Ryswick council-chamber; and when Mazarin and Don Lois de Haro met to settle the marriage of Louis XIV, with Maria Theresa, the two ministers stepped side by side into a room hung in corresponding halves with their respective colors, and sat down at the same instant on undistinguishable chairs.

The first Napoleon was foolishly tenacious of precedence, and one year seized every copy of the Almanach de Gotha, because in accordance with its custom of alphabetical arrangement, the list of reigning Houses therein published was headed Anhalt Duchies, and not Napoleon.

Among other curiosities of court etiquette, it will not be commonly known that an Ambassador has the privilege, though never used, of putting on his hat in the presence of the sovereign when he reads his reception speech. Maritime ceremonial was for more important than other forms, as being at one time the measure of maritime supremacy, and based on the theory that salutes should render the saluter temporarily powerless.

In the time of James I., England insisted upon the disappearance of the flags and sails of all other ships as a salute to her own; and it was not until the end of last century that the resistance and disputes caused by such an overbearing and disputes caused by such an overbearing requisition were finally settled, through the agreements of France and Russia to dispense with maritime salutes in any form. At this day, they are pure acts of courtesy between ships of war. ~ Chamber’s Journal; New York Times 26 Dec 1875

Rich Rarities for the Accomplished Ladies

One of the things I appreciate are old books; I often imagine whose hands actually held the books that are found and go into a world of which I have grown fond of…  Upon my research of old dusty things, I came across this article that talks about a book (J. S. (John Shirley), fl. 1680-1702) that has found its way on a shelf.

In one of the London bookshops a traveler discovered a little, yellow, timeworn book, the third edition of which was printed in 1691. On the title pages is the name in ornate script, “The Accomplished Ladies Rich Closet of Rarities; or, the Ingenuous Gentlewomen and Servant Maids Delightful Companion”.

Ladies, Learn, Ponder, and Digest These “Rich Rarities”

Discovery of a Quaint Volume in a London Book Shop Gives Various

Rules of an Ancestral Flavor for “Accomplished Ladies”.

Besides wonderful prescriptions for the healing of various maladies, and recipes for the dainties of the time, it contains counsel for the conduct of a “Young Gentlewoman” from early childhood to womanhood, covering points of etiquette and deportment, as well as the graver matters of daughterly and wifely duty.

The chapter on table manners is delightfully phrased, the quaint English recalling Chaucer’s eulogium of the “Nunne Who was also a Prioress” in the Prologue to the Canterbury Tales. It shows vividly the contrast between the customs of to-day and those of two centuries ago: Being at the Table in your due place, observe to keep your body strait, and lean not by any means with your elbows, not by ravenous gesture discover a voracious appetite; knaw no bones, but cut your meat decently with the help of your fork; make no noise in calling for anything you want, but speak softly to those that are next, or wait to give it; not be so disingenuous as to shew your dislike of anything that is before you, if strangers be at the table; especially at another’s table; eat not your spoon-meat so hot that it makes your eyes water, nor be seen to blow it. Complain not of a queasy stomach; wipe your spoon every time you dip it in the dish’ if you eat spoon-meat with others, eat not too fast, nor unseemly, neither be nice or curious at the table by mincing or mimping, as if you liked not the meat or the company; where you see variety, yet reach not after them, but stay till you have an opportunity, and them shew an indifferency as to your choice; and if it chance to happen you have a plate with some pice you fancy not presented, wait your opportunity till it be taken away and changed; nor be inquisitive (for that is not comely) to know what such a fowl or joynt cost, nor discourse of Bills of Fare; take not in your wine or other liquor too greedily, nor drink till you are out of breath, but do things with decency and order.

If you are abroad at Dinner, let not your hand be first in any dish, nor take your place unseemly; neither be induced to carve, though the Mistress of the House out of a Compliment intreat  it, unless you see a necessity for it; and wherever you carve, keep your fingers from your mouth; throw not anything over your shoulder, neither take or give anything on that side where a Person of Quality, or one much above  you, is seated, nor reach your arms over dishes to reach at what you like better.

Cut your meat handsomely and he not over desirous of sauce, nor of another sort of meant, before you have disposed or what of what is on your place. Put not both your hands to your mouth at once, not eat too greedily; let not your mouth or fingers be greasy no more than you must; and when you are satisfied, take your plate or trencher with you, or give it to those that wait, and retire, but not out of the room till grace is said and the cloth taken away; at what time making your obeisance, you may depart, unless you are desired to stay.

There are admonitions too, concerning a gentlewoman’s walk and carriage, which the athletic maidens of to-day would be well advised to study and bring into harmony with present conditions:

In this case observe that you walk not carelessly or lightly, shouldering, as it were, your companions, not strutting nor jutting in a proud manner; keep (in your walk) your head steady, your countenance not too much elevated nor dejected; keep your arms likewise steady, and throw them not about as if you were flying; let your feet rather incline a little more inward then outward, lest you be censured splay-footed; for by the motion of the body, the thoughts of the mind may be discovered; as whether the party be of loose or proud behavior, or humble and complacent.

Then follows advice with thoughts of a seemly bearing in the use of the eyes;

Keep your eyes within compass; that is, let them not be too much fixed upon idle and vain objects; - nor stare men in the face as if you were looking at babies; as often as opportunity will permit, lift up your eyes, to your Redeemer and, with holy David, implore him to TURN THEM AWAY FROM VANITY: for the eyes being the windows of the soul, lets in Good or Evil, according as it fixes, or is intent upon good or bad objects: therefore, chose the former, and refuse the latter.

Our “new women” would probably take exception to the instructions to a young gentlewoman, when married, how to carry and behave herself toward her husband, etc. as becomes a virtuous wife, but the charm of the old-time language makes beautiful and convincing the ideal of wifely duty, which we like to believe was lived up to in the world of long ago.

Above all things repine not at your lot when it is fallen to your share, but weigh your condition in the scale of content and discretion, and it will be better supported.

If your husband be very young, and given to excursions incident to youthful frailty, let your riper experience bring him to a better understanding, and your usage more easy, then to attempt by extremities to wean him from what he affects; but rather let your good example, modest reprovements, and the course of time work  upon his headstrong nature; and either through his shame, or a reform of judgement, he will be brought to himself; for doubtless conjugal duty, tempered with softness and affability, is of force to conquest the morosest temper.

If your husband is exalted in the world by Riches or Honor, let not your mind be puffed up. Though after marriage you find yourself not so happy in the things of this world, as your expected; but that, on the contrary, you are griped with the pinching hand of poverty, let the poor condition of your husband add to your virtue, in furnishing you with patience and meekness; for there is not that dangerous want, some imagine, where there wants no content.

Be peaceable and pleasant towards your husband, not angry when he is at any time so, but pacific with winning and obliging words; and if you should carelessly, or otherwise, raise him to a passion, be not long ere you apply yourself to appease it, by shewing a regret or kind relenting, for what has occasioned it, or by sound reason let him understand his error; and prepare with is necessary for him in due order, with all  imaginable neatness and advantage; shewing above all things respect to his friends and relations, whether abroad or at home, which must of necessity create in him a greater portion of Love and Respect for yourself.

As for you children, bring them up in the fear of God, and in duty and obedience to yourselves that is may be well for them and their posterity; for those are the endearing pledges of Connubial Love, that more nearly cement the hearts of Man and Wife, and re the sum of their earthly felicity.

So live, that the springs of Love, if not Prosperity, may ever flow to water your Hearts with Joy, and render Life comfortable; and you thereby be the better enable to serve your “Maker”. ~ The New York Times, 17 May 1908